Sermon on Forgiveness: seventy times seven (Matthew 18:21-35)
Jesus says that we should forgive our brother or sister who sins against us—not just seven times, but seventy-seven times. The expression means that forgiveness, which is a divine gift, needs to be practiced again and again.
And one might ask why. Sometimes I don’t want to forgive.
So let me share with you an incident that happened many years ago.
At that time, I was doing my placement, and on weekends I used to stay with a family. They were an amazing, truly Christian family. I would stay with them for three or four days every week until I finished my placement.
Next to their house there was a soccer field, and the children from the neighbourhood would play there. They were very good players, and it was a joy to watch them.
One day, one of the players—a very good striker—kicked the ball. It went up, up, up, and then came down into one of the neighbours’ backyards.
The coach and referee thought it would be better to go, apologize, and get the ball. Before they reached the house, they saw a gentleman put his head above the fence and say, “You all need to come here.”
We all thought, “Oh, this is trouble.”
The man from the family I was staying with—his name was Jim—asked me to come with him. The referee came too, and Jim asked the children who had been involved to come with us.
I thought, “Oh, you’re in trouble now!” We went into the backyard and met the husband and wife. We said hello, but there was no reply.
Then we saw what had happened.
There was a beautiful red rose bush, and one of the main branches, carrying a beautiful rose, had been broken because the soccer ball had hit it.
The man was very angry.
He said, “Look what you’ve done! This comes from carelessness and ignorance. You have damaged my garden. How could you do such a thing?”
We all looked at each other. Then Jim said very calmly, “You know what? We will fix it.” The man replied, “I don’t know how you can fix it. Look what has happened.”
So Jim brought his gardening tools. He carefully worked on the broken branch. He supported it, tied it, and did what was necessary to give the rose a chance to live.
While Jim was doing this, the owner of the house said, “I don’t know whether it will work or not. You ruined everything.”
Jim, very politely, said, “We will give it a chance. We will do our best to fix it. I promise you.” Then he asked the children to help. They cleaned the soil and grass, put everything back in order, and we apologized.
We said, “We’re sorry. Next time, we will find a way to prevent this from happening again.” The couple were still unhappy.
Before we left, the man said, “I will tell you whether it works or not. I will tell you whether my rose stays alive.”
For several weekends, the children came back. They helped clean the grass, the mulch, and everything that had been disturbed. They took responsibility for what had happened.
And amazingly enough, the rose stayed alive. The broken branch recovered, and eventually the yard looked beautiful again. Everything that needed to be fixed was fixed. But then something happened.
One weekend, Mr. Smith said to Jim and the children, “I’m not going to forgive you.”
After all the fixing, after all the work, after everything had been repaired, he said, “You have hurt my yard. It’s not forgivable. You are a bunch of careless people.”
Jim reminded him that the children had done a wonderful job for many weeks. They had taken responsibility. They had helped repair everything.
So, Jim continued and said, “Mr. Smith, I truly believe that the children have done a wonderful job. Everything is fixed and clean. I think the better way is for you to embrace that. Please don’t say this. What else can we do?”
Then he added, “I know that you are a believer. I know that you are a Christian. Why don’t you forgive? Let them go. They have learned the lesson. Let us go and live joyfully.”
But Mr. Smith said, “No. I haven’t decided to forgive you. I will tell you when I’m going to forgive.” And Jim said, “I’m sorry you feel that way. I think our mission here is finished.” And we left.
Now, this incident helps us to understand the parable Jesus tells today. And do not forget: it is a parable, a spiritual legend.
Jesus is showing us what human beings can do to themselves when they cannot forgive. What happens when we say, “I cannot forgive”?
There is anger. There is resentment. And eventually there can be bitterness. We can speak about forgiveness as a divine gift—and it is. It is part of the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ. But a gift needs to be received. And a gift needs to be practiced.
God has forgiven us. God renews us, every day, and especially every Sunday, we have the opportunity to come again to Christ—to be renewed through our worship and especially through the Holy Eucharist.
So why can’t we forgive? We need to understand something very important: Forgiveness does not mean ignoring what happened.
If somebody hurts us, we don’t simply say, “Oh, that’s okay. Everything is fine.” No.
Forgiveness means finding a way to mend what is broken and continuing our life with God. Sometimes the person who hurt us comes and apologizes. Sometimes they help to fix what they have broken. But sometimes they don’t.
So what do we do? Do we live with resentment and anger? Do we disconnect ourselves from other people and from God? Do we allow ourselves to become bitter? No.
Forgiveness is not primarily about the other person. Forgiveness is about ourselves. We say: Something happened to me. I have been hurt. I don’t want to live with this resentment. I don’t want this anger to control my life. Maybe the person who hurt me never comes to say, “I’m sorry.”
So we say to God:
“God, help me to continue my life. I don’t want to create a demon in my life and live with this demon all the time. I don’t want this anger and resentment to become part of who I am. I know I have been hurt, but I don’t want to live like this. I don’t want to disconnect myself from You. I want to reconnect through Christ to the wonderful Abba, Father we have in heaven.”
That is the beginning of forgiveness. And forgiveness also gives us wisdom. Sometimes we ourselves hurt somebody—consciously or unconsciously. We may not even realize it. So forgiveness teaches us to ask:
What am I saying? What am I doing? What am I communicating through my words, my actions, even my facial expressions? Could I be hurting someone?
Forgiveness makes us more compassionate and more aware of one another. And Jesus’ parable gives us another powerful image.
The person who refuses to forgive becomes like someone in prison, with a jailer constantly reminding him of his debt. That is what resentment can do. It can become our prison. So we have a choice:
Do we want the prison of resentment, or do we want the freedom of God’s blessing?
Again, forgiveness does not mean saying, “What happened was okay.”
It means saying, “What happened hurt me, but I refuse to let that hurt become the master of my life.” I leave it in God’s hands. I ask God for wisdom. I seek peace. And I continue walking with Christ.
And this brings us back to what we talked about last week. Jesus gives us a way to have a conversation. We can tell our brother or sister, “You have hurt me.” We can speak the truth. We can listen. We can ask, “How can we reconcile?”
That was the lesson we learned last week. Conversation. Conversation. Conversation. Individual conversation. More conversation. Church conversation. Because we cannot stop our spiritual growth.
As Christians, we are called to become the presence of forgiveness wherever we go and whatever we do. Forgiveness is a divine gift. But a gift needs to be received. And a gift needs to be practiced.
May Christ share more and more of His qualities with us in our everyday lives.
May He give us the grace to forgive—not because what happened was unimportant, but because we do not want resentment and anger to become the prison of our lives.
May He help us to reconcile within ourselves, to reconnect with one another, and above all, to remain connected through Christ to our wonderful Abba Father.
And may the fruit of forgiveness be peace, joy, love, wisdom, and new life. Amen.
How to make the Anglican Rosary
Anglican Prayer Beads
A Form of Contemplative Prayer
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Anglican Prayer Beads are a relatively new form of prayer, blending the Orthodox Jesus Prayer Rope and the Roman Catholic Rosary. The thirty-three bead design was created by the Rev. Lynn Bauman in the mid-1980s, through the prayerful exploration and discovery of a contemplative prayer group.
The use of the rosary or prayer beads helps to bring us into contemplative of meditative prayer—really thinking about and being mindful of praying, of being in the presence of God—by use of mind, body, and spirit. The touching of the fingers on each successive bead is an aid in keeping our mind from wandering, and the rhythm of the prayers leads us more readily into stillness.
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Symbolism of the Beads
The configuration of the Anglican Prayer Beads relate contemplative prayer using the Rosary to many levels of traditional Christian symbolism. Contemplative prayer is enriched by these symbols whose purpose is always to focus and concentrate attention, allowing the one who prays to move more swiftly into the Presence of God.
The prayer beads are made up of twenty-eight beads divided into four groups of seven called weeks. In the Judeo-Christian tradition the number seven represents spiritual perfection and completion. Between each week is a single bead, called a cruciform bead as the four beads form a cross. The invitatory bead between the cross and the wheel of beads brings the total to thirty-three, the number of years in Jesus’ earthly life.
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Praying with the beads
To begin, hold the Cross and say the prayer you have assigned to it, then move to the Invitatory Bead. Then enter the circle of the prayer with the first Cruciform Bead, moving to the right,
go through the first set of seven beads to the next Cruciform bead, continuing around the circle,
saying the prayers for each bead.
It is suggested that you pray around the circle of the beads three times (which signifies the Trinity)
in an unhurried pace, allowing the repetition to become a sort of lullaby of love and praise that enables your mind to rest and your heart to become quiet and still.
Praying through the beads three times and adding the crucifix at the beginning or the end, brings the total to one hundred, which is the total of the Orthodox Rosary. A period of silence should follow the prayer, for a time of reflection and listening. Listening is an important part of all prayer.
Begin praying the Anglican Prayer Beads by selecting the prayers you wish to use for the cross and each bead. Practice them until it is clear which prayer goes with which bead, and as far as possible commit the prayers to memory.
Find a quiet spot and allow your body and mind to become restful and still. After a time of silence, begin praying the prayer beads at an unhurried, intentional pace. Complete the circle of the beads three times.
When you have completed the round of the prayer beads, you should end with a period of silence. This silence allows you to center your being in an extended period of silence. It also invites reflection and listening after you have invoked the Name and Presence of God.
Closing your Prayers
The following ending can be used with any of the prayers in this booklet. After three circuits around the prayer beads, you may finish as follows:
Last time through:
Invitatory Bead
The Lord’s Prayer
The Cross
I bless the Lord.
Or, in a group setting:
Let us bless the Lord
Thanks be to God.
Prayers
You may mix and match or put together your own.
Bless the Lord
The Cross
Blessed be the one, holy, and living God.
Glory to God for ever and ever. Amen.
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The Invitatory
O God make speed to save me (us),
O Lord make haste to help me (us),
Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit: As it was in the beginning, is now, and will be forever. Amen.
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The Cruciforms
Behold now, bless the Lord, all you servants of the Lord. You that stand in the house of the Lord, lift up your hands in the holy place and bless the Lord.
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The Weeks
I lift up my eyes to the hills;
From where is my help to come?
My help comes from the Lord,
The maker of heaven and earth.
The Cross
In the Name of God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Amen.
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The Invitatory
O God make speed to save me (us),
O Lord make haste to help me (us),
Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit: As it was in the beginning, is now, and will be forever. Amen.
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The Cruciforms
Holy God,
Holy and Mighty,
Holy Immortal One,
Have mercy upon me (us).
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The Weeks
Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God,
Have mercy on me, a sinner.
Or, in a group setting:
Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, Have mercy upon us.
*Trisagion means "thrice Holy"
Agnus Dei Prayer
The Cross
The Lord’s Prayer
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The Invitatory
"Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my strength and my redeemer."—Psalm 19:14
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The Cruciforms
Oh, Lamb of God that taketh away the sins of the world
have mercy upon us,
Oh, Lamb of God that taketh away the sins of the world
have mercy upon us,
Oh, Lamb of God that taketh away the sins of the world
give us Thy Peace.
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The Weeks
Almighty and merciful Lord,
Father, Son, and Holy Spirit,
bless us and keep us.
Amen.
*Agnus Dei means "Lamb of God"
Julian of Norwich Prayer
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The Cross
In the Name of God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Amen.
The Invitatory
O God make speed to save me (us),
O Lord make haste to help me (us),
Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit: As it was in the beginning, is now, and will be forever. Amen.
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The Cruciforms
God of your goodness, give me yourself,
For you are enough to me.
And I can ask for nothing less that is to your glory.
And if I ask for anything less, I shall still be in want, for only in you have I all.
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The Weeks
All shall be well, and all shall be well,
And all manner of things shall be well.
Or
In His love He has done His works, and in His love He has made all things beneficial to us.
This prayer was created by Sister Brigit-Carol, S.D.
www.solitariesofdekoven.org
A Celtic Prayer
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The Cross
In the Name of God, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Amen.
The Invitatory
O God make speed to save me (us),
O Lord make haste to help me (us),
Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit: As it was in the beginning, is now, and will be forever. Amen.
The Cruciforms
Be the eye of God dwelling with me,
The foot of Christ in guidance with me,
The shower of the Spirit pouring on me,
Richly and generously
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The Weeks
Pray each phrase on a separate bead.
I bow before the Father who made me,
I bow before the Son who saved me,
I bow before the Spirit who guides me,
In love and adoration.
I praise the Name of the one on high.
I bow before thee Sacred Three,
The ever One, the Trinity.
This prayer was created by Sister Brigit-Carol, S.D.
www.solitariesofdekoven.org
Come Lord Jesus Prayer
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The Cross
"Blessing and glory and wisdom and thanksgiving and honor and power and might be to our God forever and ever! Amen."—Revelation 7:12
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The invitatory
"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in time of trouble."—Psalm 46:1
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The Cruciforms
"Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless God’s Holy Name."—Psalm 103:1
The Weeks
"Come Lord Jesus, draw us to yourself."—John 12:32
Saint Patrick's Breastplate
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The Cross
I bind unto myself today the strong Name of the Trinity,
by invocation of the same, the Three in One, and One in Three.
Of whom all nature hath creation, eternal Father, Spirit, Word:
praise to the Lord of my salvation, salvation is of Christ the Lord.
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The Invitatory
Christ be with me, Christ within me, Christ behind me, Christ before me,
Christ beside me, Christ to win me, Christ to comfort and restore me.
Christ beneath me, Christ above me, Christ in quiet, Christ in danger,
Christ in hearts of all that love me, Christ in mouth of friend and stranger.
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The Cruciforms
I bind unto myself today
the strong Name of the Trinity,
by invocation of the same,
the Three in One, and One in Three.
The Weeks
1. I bind this day to me for ever, by power of faith, Christ’s Incarnation;
2. his baptism in Jordan river;
3. his death on cross for my salvation;
4. his bursting from the spicèd tomb;
5. his riding up the heavenly way;
6. his coming at the day of doom:
7. I bind unto myself today.
1. I bind unto myself the power of the great love of cherubim;
2. the sweet "Well done" in judgment hour;
3. the service of the seraphim;
4. confessors’ faith, apostles’ word,
5. the patriarchs’ prayers, the prophets’ scrolls;
6. all good deeds done unto the Lord,
7. and purity of virgin souls.
1. I bind unto myself today the virtues of the starlit heaven,
2. the glorious sun’s life-giving ray,
3. the whiteness of the moon at even,
4. the flashing of the lightning free,
5. the whirling of the wind’s tempestuous shocks,
6. the stable earth, the deep salt sea,
7. around the old eternal rocks.
1. I bind unto myself today the power of God to hold and lead,
2. his eye to watch, his might to stay,
3. his ear to hearken, to my need;
4. the wisdom of my God to teach,
5. his hand to guide, his shield to ward;
6. the word of God to give me speech,
7. his heavenly host to be my guard.
Words: attributed to St. Patrick (372-466)
translated by Cecil Frances Alexander, 1889
Adapted for use with Anglican Prayer Beads by Laura Kelly Campbell
An Evening Prayer
The Cross
Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit. as it was in the beginning, is now, and will be for ever. Amen.
The Invitatory
Open my lips, O Lord,
and my mouth shall proclaim
Your praise.
The Cruciforms
Guide us waking, O Lord,
and guard us sleeping;
that awake we may watch
with Christ, and asleep
we may rest in peace.
The Weeks
Jesus, lamb of God, have mercy on us.
Jesus, bearer of our sins, have mercy on us.
Jesus, redeemer of the world, give us your peace.
